T.O. : A Snotty, Crying Shame!

T.O. , spare us the dramatics, You don’t give a damn about Tony Romo! Those tears were not for him. They were for YOU! Yesterday’s antics by Owens were only so he wouldn’t get blamed for the loss.  If the tears wasn’t bad enough, this dude here said that he had great relationships with his teammates and quarterbacks throughout his career. Now everyone knows that is lie. Let’s run it down shall we!

T.O.

-Implied that Jeff Garcia was gay

-Ran down Donovan McNabb in Philly

-Implied that if he had Favre under center in the Super Bowl, he would have a ring.

Yeah, I know that TO invited Romo to his birthday party and they are seen together on the sidelines but that doesn’t mean that there is a strong bond. Hell, TO worked out endlessly with McNabb when he first arrived in Philly and we know how that relationship ended.

Folks can say whatever they feel about Randy Moss but he took a huge paycut to be with New England because he wants to win. Moss handled his business during his first year with the pats. While TO had some great games with Dallas, he manages to get in distraction after distraction. Now, the media do come down hard on him at times but this time, TO deserves every barb he gets.

Instead of getting the popcorn ready, how about some kleenex , Midol, and a little bit of Carl Thomas.

USE A CONDOM!

   

“You’re blessed man. Use protection and limit the number of women you see” -Ray Lewis to Shawne Merriman (Quoted in 2006 Sports Illustrated article)

“A pill aint gonna keep your d**k from falling off! I don’t understand why you insist on learning things the hard way but you gon’ learn. Oh, yeah. YOU gon’ learn!” -Laurence Fishburne as Furrious Styles in Boyz N The Hood

In the wake of the Lance Briggs Paternity saga, it is known that he fathered two other children outside of his relationship with Brittini Tribbett.  Before Briggs, we have heard about the paternity drama surrounding Brian Urlacher and Tyna Roberston, Larry Fitzgerald, Matt Lienart and Travis Henry, who fathered nine, you count them, nine children out of wedlock.

With all of that said, I think that this message is on time. Look, I know that these players regardless of sport are going to be out  there sleeping around so it’s whatever. BUT, don’t complain and whine when some woman or women approach you and say “I’m pregnant” or “I have the package and you may be infected.” when you could have used protection and used it right.

Yeah, condoms may take away some of the sensation but it is better than having to pay child support for a child you did  not plan to make. It is better than getting a deadly disease. Besides, there are all sorts of condoms out here on the market that offers protection and sensations, USE THEM!

Now, you may be using condoms but you may be using them wrong or even the wrong size. When you stap it on guys, you are supposed to leave room at the tip and squeeze the air out before sex. For those who may be using the wrong size, stop trying to be something that you are not! As long as you are not hung like a gnant  or have the girth of a pencil, then you are okay, you are fine. If you are using a condom that is not your size, well you know what will happen-condom falls off, the woman discovers it  later and put you on blast on message boards and tabloids.

 Yes, there are some unscrupulous women out here and they are “Forty-Niners” if you know what I mean. You must protect yourself at all times. She’ll tell you that she is on the pill but don’t believe her. Basic, common knowlege, but for some reason, you are still getting women pregnant and paying child support, evading child support, or not paying at all. To take care of this problem, instead of just throwing the condom in the trash for her to fish out later, you should empty the condom, flush the semen and sperm down the toilet, rinse the condom and rip it up!

If you are in the posistion of having a child, make the most out of the situation. Spend your time as well as your money. If you by chance had an absentee parent growing up, remeber what it was like and make sure you break the cycle. Develop a respectful relatioship with the baby’s mother for the sake of your children. Surely, these women are not that unreasionable out here.

If the woman is pregnant, don’t tell her what to do with the baby. The choice is hers. The only thing you can do is ask her for a paternity test. If it’s yours, Just take care of your responsiblilty so you dont end up being the subject of a paternity suit. Don’t whine about child support just shut up and pay it and be safe next time!

Divorce NFL Style Part 1

 

DISCLAIMER: Look, I know this may be trifling and in bad taste. However, I promised that no stone will be left unturned on this blog. Just like the Urlacher paternity issue, Blockbuster divorces in the league is just another part of the seedier side of the game! I hope that the following entries can promote some interesting dialouge to the age old debate about athletes and marriage!

The following appeared in the December 5th editon of the San Francisco Chronicle and their website the SF Gate (http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/12/05/BAUJTO8FM.DTL) :

“Divorce court: Looks like 49ers great Jerry Rice may be about to jump from TV’s “Dancing With the Stars” to “The Bachelor.”

Records on file in San Mateo County family court show that the ex-wide receiver’s wife, Jacqueline Rice, filed for dissolution of the couple’s marriage back in June, and they are due back in court in mid-January. Meanwhile, their Atherton estate is listed for sale for a reported $22 million.

Jacqueline Rice’s attorney, Lindy Barocchi, told us only that “when the parties are ready to talk about it, they will. They have three children, and they would like the media to be mindful of the fact this is very private matter.”

Jerry Rice’s attorney, Stephen Montalvo, did not return calls seeking comment. “

Aight! Now inquiring minds want to know, what happened, while some emotional minds believe that Mrs. Rice had enough.  The cynical mind may say that she’s been talking to Shaunie O’Neal and Juanita Jordan, and want to break Jean Strahan’s record of $15 million dollars.

Folks can think whatever they like but the bottom line is this: 23 years together, and nearly 20 years of marriage is shot for reasons that they only know and what we can only speculate. Real talk, there is alot of speculation in the air.  There are a couple of gossip sites claiming that Jerry’s been “out there” while married, and he’s been out there for years.

Well if this is the case, the questions are: 1. Why did she stay? 2. Why did he get married in the first place?  I’m not even going to talk about the first question because it is not as simple as we may think. However the second question have been on my mind ever since Michael Jordan’s divorce. If you are an athlete and you know you cannot resist temptation, why in hell would you get married in the first place knowing that you may lose half of what you earned and own in the event of divorce?

The Rices and the Strahans are the latest in a growing list of NFL divorces over the past five years or so. Ahman Green is divorced after a domestic violence incident (2005) (http://www.usatoday.com/sports/football/2005-04-28-ahman-green-divorce_x.htm), Coach Bill Parcells divorced his wife of 40 years (2002) (http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/print?id=1319895&type=news), Keyshawn Johnson divorced his wife in 2002 as well.

According to a USA TODAY article titled “Life After the NFL Typically A  Stuggle”   (http://www.usatoday.com/sports/football/super/2006-01-28-retirement-perils_x.htm), 78% of NFL players are divorced, bankrupt, or unemployed two years after retiring.

As everyone know by now, California is a community property state. Do the math! We are looking at  nearly 20 years together, three children (2 of them are minors), and 11 million if the house sells, Mrs. Rice is looking at a hefty settlement. Now watch folks ask “How many touchdowns did Jackie score?” just like  the questions of ” How many sacks did Jean Strahan make?”. Watch the outcries of she don’t deserve all of that money or she don’t deserve anything.

I have something for that in the next entry!

Sick Nasty: Eagles-56 Lions-21

 

Photos from NFL.com

At halftime of the San Diego/Green Bay game, Dan Marino elequently described the Eagles’ route of the Lions as “Sick Nasty”  To tell you the truth, the score wasnt the only thing that was sick nasty on the field. For starters, no one on the field played defense yesterday. Philadelphia gave up 536 yards while Detroit gave up 432 yards.

Secondly, look at Philly’s uniforms LOL! The Eagles are celebrating their 75th anniversary and they are wearing the 1933 jerseys for a few games. Hey, if they can put out the same effort sans the sloppy defense, they should keep the uniforms for the rest of the year..

Shady Brady and Bill Bellicheat

LMMFAO @ this whole mess.  Honestly, Goodell’s punishment was a joke! A half a million to Bellicheck is nothing. A $200,000 plus team fine is nothing.  I believe that Coach Bellicheck should be suspended for 4 games in addition to the fine, and the Patriots should forfiet the Jets game.

Like I said in my previous thread about this topic. If you want to spy on a defense, spy on Pittsburgh’s, Baltimore’s, San Diego’s and Indianapolis’! Spying on the Jets was pretty retarded!  New England could have beat the Jets and their meat at the same time. There was no need to spy on this squad.

I’m laughing my ass off at Bellicheck for thinking that Eric Mangini would not sell him out!  He had to know that  Mangini was going to snitch because it is not like these two are the best of friends. Eric had a great motive to sell out Bill!

IF the Patriots lose Sunday, I can just hear the sports media  picking these guys apart.

A Message to The Sports Media

MEMO

TO: Various Football reporters and Fox’s Terry Bradshaw

FROM: Jannelle @ The Red Zone

RE: Disgusting displays of Jockriding and Groupiedom

Hey guys,

While I respect what you all do week after week, with your breakdown of the games and such, the general public can do without your collective gushing over your man crushes. 

Week after week,  we have to hear just how great, skilled, and charmed Tom Brady is. We also have to hear about Tony Romo’s relationship with who ever and how he needs to upgrade. We have to endure your brownosing of Brett Favre as well. For your sanity, I hope he plays forever because once he retires, you all will treat the ocassion as a death in the family.

Speaking of Favre, Mr. Bradshaw, you are even worse than the others when it comes to #4! You are like Brett’s number one stan because you can see yourself in him. Your affinity for Favre is understandable-both of you are from rural towns in the south and both of you had your battles with the bottle, and last but not least both of you are legendary quarterbacks! However Terry, you should keep your affinity in check, be as fair as possible while maintaining your sense of humor.

Now, I’m not a shrink but I believe that your jockriding of Brady, Romo, Favre and whoever is because you secretly want what they have.  To me, I think that it sucks for you all to be this way because you guys are accomplished in your own right.  You don’t see Dan Marino, Jerome Bettis, Tiki Barber or Rodney Peete doing what you all are doing. These guys are not having man crushes because for one, they know how to state their admiration and respect without going overboard. Secondly, they are secure with themeselves and their accomplishments!

The fawning, stanning and crushing is making you all look like groupies. The only difference between you guys and them is you have a two pens and a microphone and they have Louis Vutton and Gucci handbags,  a pair of pradas, fake breasts, fake butts and hair weaves.

 Gentlemen, this is not a good look for you. It is unbecomming and unecessary! I’m not doing this out of meaness, I’m doing this out of concern. I wouldn’t be writing this if I didnt care! So with that said, most of you reporters do not have a reason to long for what your “crushes” have because you are accomplished and successful yourselves. I know you all can do better than this, and it is about time you act  like it.

NFL IDOL

For the longest, I always thought that the Bears were the only ones that did a music video.  To my shock and horror, I was wrong. I found on you tube the Cowboys, LA Raiders and the infamous 49er Rap. Since the Bears have company in the cheesy songs and videos category, I think it’ll be fun to compare and contrast.

Bears- Super Bowl Shuffle

Niners-49er Rap

Cowboys-Living The American Dream

Raiders-Silver and Black Attack

 

Now, you have the vids! Which ones were decent? Which ones were a hot mess?

Pacman Wrestles?

 

Well, It looks like Pacman Jones will be making it rain in the squared circle.

According to Nashville’s WTVF-5, Jones is on the verge of signing a contract with Total Nonstop Action  Wrestling (TNA). This deal will be official tomorrow at the earliest. It is said that the disgraced Titans CB will play some sort of role but he won’t be wrestling, and he won’t be a heel (villian).

So if he’s not wrestling or playing a villian, then what will he be doing? Will he throw money in the ring at organization’s  next pay per view? If TNA could sign him, why not find him somthing to do?  If it were me, I would have Jones in the ring wrestling. He might as well be wrestling because he is suspended for the entire season and I’m not sure if Tennessee wants him back.

Honestly, I believe that this is a mistake wating to happen because it is possible that Jones could rehabilitate his image and get back to business. However, he may not be taken seriously after this stunt.  If I were Pacman, I would do some training and study on my own. I would do every and anything possible to have a connection to the game without training camp and the regular season. I would make sure the football media would get news of me working out, studying and staying out of trouble.  After the season, I would then meet with Titan officials about the plans for the team. If I’m not in those plans, I would ask for a realase/opt out of my contract.  Basically, I would do everything in my power to rebuild my image to make me marketable for other teams.

But, someone just had to be Pacman.

Thirsty Old Man

 

According to penthouse pet/model Kimberly Williams, NFL Hall Of Famer Marcus Allen would not leave her alone. She told Steppin Out Magazine that based on a few phone calls, Allen ’seemed like a really nice guy’. That was until she found his myspace page filled with chicks showing grattitude for “lunch”. Williams also discovered that Allen is a regular at the Playboy Mansion.   After those discoveries, Kimberly pulled away and Marcus blitzed her with 15 phone calls a day and text messages.

Williams said that Allen sent her a text where he said “Where the hell are you Kimberly?” and he also blew up at her for being nude on Howard Stern.

 Isn’t that some crazy stuff? Marcus, she don’t want you! Go back to  Hugh’s crib or back to your myspace and find another chick worth bothering. Don’t you have any pride? Don’t you feel ashamed for chasing recklessly? Is times that bad for you ?

I don’t blame Kimberly for giving her own rendition of the Heisman to Allen. I respect the fact that Kimberly wanted to pull away after seeing all of that. I respect her for trusting her instinct. As for Allen, I noticed in the articles where your lawyer said that it was the other way around. Whatever, you know if she was the pursuer, she wouldn’t have to be doing that for long since you were smitten with her from the start. You and your lawyer concocted that story to massage your bruised ego!

Chalk it up as a loss like I said and try again.  If push comes to shove, try out as a contestant on Dancing With The Stars. It worked wonders for Jerry’s and Emmitt’s profile with women. But whatever you do, don’t act thirsty. It’s unattractive and pathetic!

Don’t Hate The Players. Hate the GaMe

 

 

Since 2001, the Detroit Lions recorded a staggering and downright vulgar record of 24 wins and 72 losses. While the players and coaches have their role to play in this, dont direct your ire, disgust, and rage to these guys. After all, they are trying to turn chicken crap into chicken salad. The blame for the Lions’ sad state should be and is on the hands and shoulders of general manager Matt Millen and team owner William Clay Ford!

For six years, Millen picked bust after bust and signed players of questionable athletic prowess. The result: six seasons of embarassing futility. If that is not bad enough, Ford gave this hack a  five year extension at the beginning of the 2005 season, and apparently have no regrets in that decison. What in the blue and silver hell is wrong with Ford? Doesn’t he realize that this decision is the main reason why the Lions haven’t been to the playoffs since 1999? Unfortunately for  hard-working, self-respecting Lions fans, Ford can give 1/4ths of a damn about the state of the team. If he did, he wouldn’t have signed Millen to ruin future seasons.

The Lions can get out of this mess easily by listening to the fans’ cries of “Fire Millen” This guy is front office poison, and it is up to Ford to suck the venom out of this gaping wound.

Just because a man was a decent player in his day, doesn’t mean he should coach or run your team!